Are You Fearful—or Just Practical? 2 Questions to Help You Make the Best Decisions of Your LifeBy Tama Kieves
Are you at a turning point in your life? You may have more questions than answers.
Whether you’re going through a rough patch in your marriage, experiencing a fluctuation in your health or business, or pining for fulfilling self-expression, it’s easy to feel uncertain. Is this the time in your life to take a risk? Or should you use caution? Are your fears holding you back, or do they represent the voice of reason? And is the voice of reason actually reasonable in this situation?
I’ve had the privilege to be a career, life, and success coach for decades, and this is what I know: You already have a path. It’s not something you figure out; it’s a trajectory you let out. You let it out by learning how to listen to yourself.
Learning which instincts to listen to can change your whole life. I know this not only as a coach, but from pivotal personal experience.
When I was younger, I knew I loved writing. But I grew up in Brooklyn, New York, in an Orthodox Jewish family. “You’re going to write? You’re going to starve!” said my mother. So I got “serious” and graduated from Harvard Law School. I worked for a corporate law firm. Everyone thought I’d made a “practical” choice. But really, I’d chosen out of fear.
And a decision made from fear leads to more fear. I felt depressed at work. I lived a “successful life” on the outside. But I was dying of meaninglessness. I wasn’t doing what I really wanted to do. I thought about taking my own life.
Finally, a friend said, “If you’ve been this successful doing something you don’t love, what could you do with what something you do love?”
I left law without a plan—and I’ve now written four books on creating a life you love, led hundreds of workshops and retreats, and found my exquisite truth.
And from my experience, I’ll tell you this: No matter what fears come up, it’s never practical to ignore your deepest desires. It’s always more secure to express your full potential.
Of course, not all fear is frivolous. It’s healthy to fear grizzly bears or the mafia. This type of fear boosts your odds of survival. It’s also wise to listen to a fear that tells you you’re not rea