Why Your Bucket List Needs a Makeover
Do you have a bucket list? Many people maintain lists of things they want to do, be, or experience before they die. They often have unwritten bucket lists in the back of their minds: “I’d like to start my own company.” “I’d like to do a triathlon.” “I’d like to see Venice someday.”
I have mixed feelings about these lists. On the one hand, I like the idea of setting goals for things that are important to you, and then figuring out how to accomplish those goals. A goal can be purposeful, such as volunteering for a political campaign to help someone you admire get elected. Or the goal can be for something pleasurable, such as swimming with dolphins in Mexico.
On the other hand, some people do things so superficially that the activity hardly “counts” at all. For example, I once made great efforts to help someone see a European cathedral, just to have him walk out after two minutes because he only needed 120 seconds to “do” the cathedral.
My belief is that your life will be richer and more meaningful if you slow down enough to pay attention and savor your experience. In fact, many of us are so busy multitasking and racing around experiencing things that we really shortchange ourselves of the beauty of the present moment.
For instance, have you ever hiked a long distance to get to the top of a mountain, only to arrive at the peak and immediately start thinking about your ride back home? Or say you’re on vacation in Montreal, but you’re already talking about your next trip to New Orleans? Or you’re watching a Broadway musical, but worrying about the next day’s trip to the Statue of Liberty?
These are problems that arise when we are not being mindful, or aware of the present moment.
I’m reminded of the saying, “The purpose is not to fit more years into your life, but to fit more life into your years.” At first glance, I can interpret this quote to mean, “Go ahead! Do more stuff! Don’t just do the same thing! Live life intensely.”
That’s a great approach. But then, you can imagine that, taken to an extreme, a person following this suggestion is just running around, striving to complete their bucket list, without really slowing down to enjoy any of it. The rise of social media has made this insanity even worse, as people experience life more as an efficient photo shoot than as, well, life!
As an alternative, you can interpret the quote to mean, “Stop racing and start living!” No matter how long you live, you’ll be a lot happier and more successful if you savor each hour of each day—whether you’re visiting a city on your bucket list, sitting at home listening to music, or just reading a good book.
If you can’t learn how to enjoy the simplest of daily pleasures, then extraordinary experiences probably won’t have much positive impact on you either. Instead, why not create a bucket list of the day—a “bucket list du jour,” if you will. Think of it as a daily bucket list for mindfulness. It might look something like this:
• I notice many variations of smells and savor the ones I like.
• I smell and taste the food I eat while consciously putting words to the flavors and textures.
• I smell and taste the liquids that I drink, giving them the same attention I would if I were at a luxurious wine-tasting event.
• I recognize the beauty of colors, shapes, and patterns throughout the day—orange and turquoise, curved and straight, plaid and polka dot, leopard skin and lavender.
• I appreciate my sense of touch of things warm, cool, cold, hot, rough, smooth, soft, fuzzy, prickly, squishy, shallow, or deep.
• I notice all the varieties of sounds—espresso machines, barking dogs, rustling leaves, pounding drums, TV commercials, and the voices of people talking to me.
• I marvel at my bodily sensations and my ability to move and feel gravity.
• I notice the eye color of those who are speaking with me.
• I pay attention to whether someone I see looks happy, sad, or any other emotion. I attempt to put their emotion into words.
• I seek opportunities to be compassionate to others—by word, or action, or thought.
• I laugh.
What is your bucket list for mindfulness, just for today?
Go ahead and create your “racing all over the world” bucket list, if you insist. But make sure you practice your daily mindfulness bucket list as well—so that you can truly savor each day.
Jim McCarthy is a TEDx speaker and #1 best-selling author of Live Each Day: A Surprisingly Simple Guide to Happiness. He teaches people how to create their happiness by blending mindfulness techniques and timeless wisdom with simple, science-based practices. Jim is recognized for his unique perspective as a Stanford MBA, internet pioneer, and person living with a cancer diagnosis. Learn more at JimMcCarthy.com.
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